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Vulnerability & Courage in Leadership

3/1/2019

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Vulnerability is such a gut-wrenching feeling none of us care to experience and we tend to avoid it like the plague. According to Merriam-Webster, vulnerability is “the capability of being physically or emotionally wounded, open to attack or damage, exposed to the possibility of criticism.” As leaders, we have the tendency to feel like we need to “have it all together”, to be flawless, and to have all the answers. I know that I have felt this way before. Vulnerability is often viewed as an indication of weakness, however, it can actually be very powerful and one of our greatest assets.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 ESV reads, “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
When I think of vulnerability, I immediately think of Jesus. He was THE most vulnerable being to ever walk the earth. Throughout his ministry years, he received much criticism, and was attacked both verbally and emotionally. On the cross, he was fully exposed so that he could bear our shame, our imperfections and our brokenness and bring us back into relationship with our Father. I really don’t think you can be more vulnerable than that. Because of Jesus’ willingness to be vulnerable, he opened the doors of eternal life for every single one of us. It is in our own vulnerability, that we can be great leaders. It is through our vulnerability that we can be catalysts of change for others.  

The question is, how do we have the courage to not only be vulnerable, but to embrace it? Here are some important things I have learned:

1. It’s okay to ask for help.

Being teachable and seeking out guidance from others is a really great thing. Asking for help is not a sign that you are weak, but that you are a human being.


2. Perfection is a lie.

It’s absolutely okay to not be okay and to make mistakes as a leader. The important thing is to own them and grow from them. A lot of us strive for perfection, however, aside from Jesus, perfection does not exist.


3. Vulnerability is extremely powerful.

It is a gift to those whom we are leading. When we are vulnerable, it is then that we are relatable and as a result can connect more deeply with the people whom we are leading. As a result, this leads them to opportunities for change and growth.


4. Draw courage from Jesus.

The courage and strength to be vulnerable needs to be sought out from the One who displayed this state in its truest form. Philippians 4:13: “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”.


Sources:   
Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary

Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brene Brown.

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Danielle Hazlett serves as the NLC Kids Director at Next Level Church, where she oversees the kid's ministry across all NLC locations and equips the kids team leads so that they can raise up a generation of world changers. Danielle and her husband, Joe, together with their daughter live in Saco, Maine.
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3 Ways to Improve Your Communication

2/8/2019

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Have you ever poured your heart out just to have somebody not understand anything you tried to communicate? Are you stuck in a cycle of sharing the same information over and over? Does it ever feel like no one understands what you are trying to say?

Have you ever considered that the problem might not be everyone else’s inability to understand what you’re saying, but could potentially be the way you communicate?
Here are three major factors that will improve how you communicate:

1. Clarity: Speaking in a manner that is clear is step one to being understood. Some limiting factors to the ability to speak clearly are things such as articulation, verbiage, and preparedness. If you mumble your words, speak over someone’s head, or are simply not confident in the information you are sharing due to being unprepared you will not be understood and communication will break down. Speaking at a 7th grade reading level, slowing down to annunciate words more clearly, and being prepared to share the information you are trying to communicate are three things you can do to become more clear in your communication.

2. Conciseness: Over-sharing too much information, or unneeded information, will dilute the point you are trying to make. To become more concise, ask yourself if what you are about to communicate is NECESSARY to sharing the full picture of what you are wanting to share. Look for times that you begin repeating yourself and simply stop, as sharing the same point over and over will cause your listener to tune out.  Try to keep each conversation limited to only a few, very impactful words, similar to a stick of dynamite, small in size but powerful in action!

3. Care: People do not care how much you know until they know how much you care. Information that is shared out of selfish ambition or anger will never truly be communicated well. Half of all communication is in the recipient’s willingness to hear the information being shared. A caring heart, coupled with carefully picked words, will be incredibly effective at impacting people’s lives.
Now that we have gone over what goes into proper communication, what happens when one area is left out or is poorly utilized?

When we are CLEAR and CONCISE but not caring, we can get our point across swiftly, at the expense of other’s feelings. This will indefinitely halt any potential for the progress you desired in the beginning.

When we are CLEAR and CARING but not concise, we lose people’s interest, attention, and possibly their respect. They will not hear your point as they will be confused by the multiple ways you tried to share one idea, and will be stuck trying to find the differences between each idea rather than the similarity.

When we are CARING and CONCISE but not clear, we make no point at all. We send someone away, thinking they understood what we said; yet we simply confuse them and potentially hurt them through unclear communication and lack of definition as to what the true issue is.

So, after reading all of this information, which area do you need to focus on for the next season in life? Do you need to be more concise? Clear? Caring?

Practice on your co-workers before your spouse. They get to WORK with you; your spouse has to LIVE with you ☺

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Alan Morse serves as one of our executive pastors at Next Level Church. His role allows him to oversee our location pastors and create systems and processes which enable them to do their job effectively. He and his wife Kate live in Somersworth, New Hampshire. In his free time, Alan likes to play winter golf, play summer hockey, and eat meals made of food. 
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A Leader’s Guide to the Holiday Season

12/15/2017

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I don’t know about you, but Christmas snuck up on me real fast this year! As a result, I was projected rapidly into a whirlwind of overwhelming feelings. All of a sudden, I found myself wondering, “how in the world will I be able to check off all of the things that I have to do on my work and home to-do lists?” I had been feeling like there was no way that I could do it all, that all of a sudden my life was a cluttered mess. Sound familiar?

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One would think that because I work within a church that I would be surrounded by Jesus and spend countless hours with Him. One would think that I have my life together and that everything is great most or all of the time. Well, I have to admit, that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Like everything else, it can be so easy to get caught up in the “to-dos” of both home and ministry life. As a result, we can so easily forget about our relationships with others and our most important relationship of all, with our Heavenly Father.  

Now more than ever, as a leader in ministry, it is critical that I be intentional about my relationship with my Heavenly Father.  The busyness of this Christmas season has been an important reminder that I need to pause…breathe…seek God...and be still. So here is my “don’t do” list and my rewritten “to-do” list.

Don’t:
  1. I am NOT going to worry:  Philippians 4:6-7 reads “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.” Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
  2. I will NOT try to be like everyone else who appears to have it all together, because the reality is, they don’t. Paul says in Romans 12:2, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
Do:  
  1. I WILL carve out time to be with my Heavenly Father each and every day. Matthew 6:33 reads, “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.”
  2. I WILL acknowledge that these seasons of feeling overwhelmed ebb and flow and are only temporary, as mentioned in 2 Corinthians 4:18: “While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.”
  3. I WILL fix my eyes on Jesus. Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I will take a moment, be still, take a breath and say a heartfelt prayer to the One who is Peace.

As a leader it is important to be authentic and real. It’s okay to acknowledge that we don’t always have it together. For those we lead, what a gift it is for them to see that!  I absolutely love that one of our core values of Next Level Church is that “It’s okay to not be okay.”  It’s okay to admit that at times we are a complete mess. We don’t have to appear as though we have it all together. Quite frankly, that doesn’t really exist for anyone. Rather than worry about these things, I desire to be led by my Heavenly Father and soak up His glorious presence.I don’t want to get caught up in the things of this world and lose focus on the birth of the most important leader of them all, Jesus. My prayer is that each and every one of you can do the same. To be reminded that it is okay to embrace the messes that we are in, and to learn from the greatest Leader of all time.

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Danielle Hazlett serves as the Kid's Director at Next Level Church, where she oversees the kid's ministry across all NLC locations and equips the kids team leads so that they can raise up a generation of world changers.  Danielle and her husband, Joe, together with their daughter live in Saco, Maine.
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